Please Research: Nursing During Pregnancy

I've mentioned in some of my previous posts that I am still nursing Bug, even though I am pregnant. Breastfeeding during pregnancy is often misunderstood and even taboo! I think some of the reasons that people are so uncomfortable with nursing during pregnancy, is because most women don't nurse very long in the first place! And nursing itself is a much debated topic in Western culture!

Then, when you add pregnancy to it, people think that the mother is being irresponsible. What if it causes the mother to miscarry? Or what if the baby isn't getting the nutrients to grow properly? There is plenty of research and information out there to show that breastfeeding during pregnancy is NOT dangerous to the unborn child. There are some circumstances where it may be advised to wean an older child (i.e., if the mother has a history of miscarriage) but weaning is rarely necessary.

When a woman is breastfeeding in a pattern often called "ecological breastfeeding", she is nursing her child as often at the child wants. This often means that a baby sleeps next to a mother and nurses frequently at night, as well as nursing frequently during the day. The stimulation of the nipple during frequent breastfeeding causes the body to produce hormones that remind the mom's body that "there is a baby here that still needs milk and a lot of attention". This means that the mom keep producing milk (as much as the baby needs) and often prevents the mother from returning to fertility, so she won't have to worry about taking care of another baby when she already has one that still needs a lot of attention. When the child gets older, he may start eating more solid foods, and start nursing less (less may be one less feeding, or even suddenly cutting out several feeding). This decrease in nipple stimulation tells the body, "Oh, I don't have to make as much milk and the baby that was so demanding before doesn't need as much attention anymore". Then, the body returns to fertility, and the mother is able to get pregnant again. But the main thing here is, the child doesn't have to wean completely for this to happen. There isn't really a known threshold, either. I think it has a lot to do with what the mother's body can handle. For myself, I didn't return to fertility until Bug was about 18 months old. Some women become fertile again much sooner (even while ecologically breastfeeding) and some take much longer.

Shortly after returning to fertility, I became pregnant. Bug was still nursing, and I didn't make him stop. Bug's nursing pattern had definitely changed from when he was a newborn, but I still feel like he was nursing pretty frequently. And he kept it up for a while at the beginning of my pregnancy, even though it was uncomfortable for me. An early pregnancy symptom is tenderness of the breasts, and that often makes nursing uncomfortable for pregnant mothers. It definitely was difficult for me, but I stuck it out and continued to let Bug nurse, because it is so comforting to him. I would like to report, however, that the discomfort of nursing has gone away.

A couple weeks ago, I realized that my milk supply had decreased to almost nothing. I noticed Bug would get frustrated as soon as he latched on, because nothing was coming out! I tried hand expressing, and only got a small, pin-head sized drop of thick, creamy, and sticky colostrum. Bug still nurses occasionally, but it is obviously only for comfort and to be close to his mommy!

When I began nursing, I told myself that I wanted to nurse to at least a year. Sometime within that first year, I knew that I wanted to nurse for as long as Bug wanted to nurse (child-led weaning). It helped me continue nursing, even when it was difficult. And, even know, I am still nursing Bug, even though he isn't getting much or anything at all! There have been times when I have refused to let Bug nurse (so I guess I don't technically qualify as practicing child-led weaning). But, mostly, Bug has become more interested in other foods and other comfort measures on his own. I (usually) enjoy nursing Bug. It is a beautiful and tender relationship that I have with him. I am sure it will be bittersweet when I realize that Bug has nursed for the last time. But until then, I will confidently nurse him...even though I'm pregnant!

Messler

I am from now and henceforth (or whatever the fancy wording should be, I'm not sure my preggo brain is going to help me much in the way of looking intelligent!) changing the word "toddler" into "messler". After all, they get really good at walking pretty fast, so they aren't "toddling" very long....and then all they do is make messes!

The reason being:

Today, I have changed two poopy diapers. One of those diapers was more than just a dirty diaper. It was a dirty diaper that my messler took off himself, and successfully got "dirty" in more locations that I wished for. I put him in the shower...and I got in, too.

Today, I cleaned greasy lotion out of my messler's hair. And off my messler's hands. And off my messler's face. And I changed his outfit...again.

Today, I cleaned spaghetti sauce out of the carpet in about a billion different spots. Then, I wiped sauce off of the high chair, the table, the legs of two other chairs, and off of every visible part of my messler. Then I changed his outfit...again.

Also, my messler has taken out about 200 snack sized plastic bags and scattered them around the living room. He has dumped his toy box in the living room. He found some Styrofoam, and tore it into little pieces.

And...now I hear my messler getting into something else...I think it is nap time!

Here we go again...

Snow. Snow. More snow. Toddler tantrum. One good day. Pregnancy yuckies. Vertigo. Toddler tantrum. Snow. Snow.

This past week, I had a birthday. Which always meshes together with Valentine's Day. So, I got lots of love and attention from the hubby, but I wasn't sure which holiday exactly it was for. But, I did get a big piece of cheesecake from The Cheesecake Factory. And that makes for a good weekend!

I also started seeing a midwife. Really, she doesn't do regular prenatal checkups until 20 weeks, so we just sat around and talked, pretty much. There is still that part of me (actually a pretty big a huge the majority of me) that really just wants to go completely unassisted. Darn those relationships that require compromise and all that!

Bug has started taking his own pants and diaper off when he needs a change. Unfortunately, the only time he recognizes that he needs a change is after he poops. He waddles around with his legs spread apart, the little cowboy, then proceeds to undress once he finds a suitable spot...usually over carpet. People have been telling me that means he is ready to potty train. I just wish he would wait for warmer weather!!!

If anybody is interested, yes, I am still nursing Bug. And he still sleeps in our bed. Usually, I'm satisfied with the situation. Mostly because I don't want to put in the effort to change anything. I'm ok with Bug nursing, as long as he doesn't do it for too long...because I am TENDER!!! I really do eventually want to do a whole post on nursing during pregnancy. Who knows, by the time I get around to it, it may be a post on tandem nursing!!! I guess Bug will need to be out of our bed when the new baby comes, but for now he helps keep me warm. And in the mornings, he can be really cute. The other morning, he started nursing, but was mostly asleep still. Then, all the sudden, he started giggling -while he was latched on-! The hubs and I joked that I must have "funny honey" that comes out through my milk every now and then!

I am right on the border between my first and second trimesters. It's is really hard still. Some days, I feel like I'm right in the middle of my first trimester! Exhaustion, fatigue, nausea...and even today I have been experiencing vertigo...which is probably more annoying that everything else put together! Someone, please make time go faster! Make it warm outside, and make me hugely pregnant! Everybody knows that being hugely pregnant is way better than being in the crummy stage of pregnancy!!!

To Eat or Not To Eat

Oh, yes. That is the question! And not just for me. Some days, Bug will eat and eat and eat. He will clean his plate at every meal, and beg me for a snack three minutes later. Other days, I am begging him to "just take a bite" of his dinner...because I feel like he hasn't had anything to eat since his small bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios at 7am. (By the way, that kid loves Honey Nut Cheerios. Or Honey Nut Scooters or whatever the cheap brand is called! I pour a small bowl, add a little milk to soften them up, and he gobbles them down. On the days that Bug is refusing to eat, I am tempted to feed him cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner...just so I know he has food in his stomach!) Amazing how his appetite can be so dynamic!

As for my recent eating habits...things are getting a little bit better. I have been craving a 4pm salad, complete with Caesar croutons and generously doused in Italian dressing, nearly every day. And often, a couple of cucumbers. I prefer the little salad cucumbers, because they are sweeter and almost never bitter. But, it is so frustrating to have to peel and slice enough of them to satisfy me! Those snacks mostly prevent my nausea from getting too bad. (Notice, I didn't say that my nausea had gone away. It is still there torturing me if I wait until 4:01pm before eating that salad!) It is really strange that I haven't been craving sweets at all. That is incredibly different for me! In fact, there are so many things that are different in me about this pregnancy (with the exception of ridiculously dry and flaky skin) that everyone is assuming that it MUST be a girl! I will keep my fingers crossed.

But, whether it is a girl or a boy, I am excited. Unfortunately, my sleeping has been taking a rough hit. Bug is such a bed hog and he wakes up to nurse way more often than I want him to (which is him waking up at all). I know he is old enough to night wean, but I am afraid that a night wean would really be a total wean! I don't think I'm ready for that! I just want to get him into his own bed, and see if that helps. I've loved co-sleeping with him...but with a new baby on the way, things are going to have to change! And, no matter how excited I am to have another little baby....part of me can't wait until the new baby is old enough to become Bug's new co-sleeping partner! Perhaps it won't be too long before I get my bed back, after all!

Toddlers CAN be great!

Hi. Hello. Remember me?! I'm The Mother. The one who used to post frequently on this blog. The one who used to be funny and tell stories about the crazy life of a mother. I'm still here. Sometimes. For the most part, I'm still reading all those other blogs that I love to read. And sometimes....just sometimes, I actually comment on them. And every now and then, I actually get around to putting some energy into this here blog. (But it's just a little bit of energy, so don't expect anything great!)

Anyway, I'm sure you all are sick and tired of hearing about how I'm sick and tired. I figure I've only got about 3-4 more weeks of that (which means you may only have to read about 2 more posts about it all, before this pregnancy starts to get really interesting)! I'm still chugging on with life. I actually did the dishes this morning! (Honey, would you PLEASE rinse out your Tupperware when you get home. I'm afraid I won't be able to do the dishes anymore if you don't!) So...I've actually lost like 2 pounds so far. Last night I had one of my pregnant woman crazy moments. I asked the husband if he ever thought that I was faking being sick. He said....very sheepishly...that yes, he had wondered. Then, I reminded him that I can rarely finish the food on my plate anymore, and THAT is VERY out of character for me. He acknowledged that I was right, and that I probably don't fake being sick (which, for the record, I haven't...yet...but if it helps in 3-4 weeks to keep it up, I may!) Then he asked me if he could do anything for me. Wonderful, sweet man!

Bug, too, has been a wonderful and sweet man boy! Whenever I find myself bawling my eyes out and whining about how I can't go on in this tortured state, Bug is by my side, rubbing my arm and giving me the sweetest little toddler eyes in the whole world. He is TOTALLY going to be by my side when I go into labor! I know he will fantastic labor support. (And if I find I can't stand him at the time, my mom will be there to take him away, 'cause moms are great, too!) Oh, Bug also learned how to open doors. This is actually a great thing, at least for now, because he hasn't used his talent for ill yet! It means in the morning, he can get down and out of bed and go into the living room to play. And I get to stay in bed until I hear him destroying something! It's a wonderful life!

Can't a girl get a nap?

Since the vomiting episode, life hasn't gotten much easier. Bug is...better. Of course, I'm not sure if that is the best way to describe it. He did have diarrhea for a couple days after the upchucking. And we ran out of laundry. And I was too tired to do it. THAT day, the day the earth pretty much imploded on itself, I was the one that was really sick. And not just "I'm pregnant and feel crummy all the time" sick. It was way worse.

I began the day at 4:45am. I got up and went to the bathroom to empty my stomach contents into our toilet. It was the first time this pregnancy. Then, I went back to sleep. Only to get up a little after 6am. Apparently, someone hit the repeat button, and I was in the bathroom again. Before I knew it, we were all up for the day.

I was tired. My stomach was cramping. And I didn't want to eat anything. I knew that pregnancy sickies can be made to go away (for at least a short amount of time) by eating. I tried to eat. I got down a banana. Then I had to change a diaper. A really bad diaper. And I had to change the little pants that kept that bad diaper from getting all over my carpet.

The I ate one cracker, changed another bad diaper and fished around for the only clean pair of pants for Bug. I couldn't find the pants. I looked around the house. I saw a massively destroyed living room, a kitchen piled high with stinky and dirty dishes, dirty laundry smeared with crusty poop and vomit overflowing from the hamper....and I thought about how tired and horrible I felt....then I lost it. I cried and cried.

I didn't know what to do, so I called the husband and bawled to him about how miserable I was and I begged him to come home. So, he did.

While he was on his way home, I ate one baby carrot, and crawled into bed with Bug. We were napping when he arrived. When we woke up, the dishes were done, the living room was clean, the laundry was being done. My husband is obviously a super human, one of a kind, hunk of a hero! Gosh, I love that man! He even went and got me a roast beef sandwich...even though I was only able to take three bites.

Since that day, I have been feeling better. I still feel like crap, but it's the better kind. The normal pregnant kind. I'm a little bit better at handling all the messes. For instance, I haven't cried once since that day, even though every time I go to take a nap, Bug refuses to join me and instead causes mischief around the house. Mischief like emptying bags of cereal or brown sugar onto the kitchen floor. And I was actually able to laugh when Bug stacked three -glass- cups on top of each other at my parents' house.

Toddlers sure are full of energy. It doesn't always make a good match with a mother who is so un-full of energy it is laughable! But, today, we sat down together and starting watching Tarzan, and I had tears of joy and love come to my eyes. I was reminded that even though things are really difficult right now, I love my family. I love this little boy that I helped to create. And I love my husband who works to hard for us. And I'm so excited for the little baby that will be joining us.

Now, if only I could get a nap!

I've been attacked!

I have been attacked by the pregnancy crummies. Or, just the first trimester crummies, I guess. Either way, I feel crummy. Almost to the point that I have no energy or desire to do anything (other than sleep, of course.) I think I am more exhausted than I would normally be, because I am still nursing Bug. And on top of that, I feel nauseous 24/7, so I'm probably not eating as well as I should be. How can I eat well if nothing sounds good!?! I just want to keep from throwing up whatever I get down (which I have been successful with so far).

And, speaking of throwing up....Bug did. All over me. And himself. AT A LA LECHE LEAGUE MEETING. That I didn't drive to by myself.

So, I changed his clothes, and cleaned up the both of us as best as I could. But I still smelled it. And I sat through the meeting (my ride was the leader of the group, so I couldn't exactly beg her to take me home), feeling very nauseous with the smell of sick in my nose. Then, when the meeting was nearly over, But threw up again. Luckily, this time it was only breast milk. But I couldn't change him into clean clothes (because I had already put him in his spare outfit.) I called the hubby, who was finally able to come and get me. Hallelujah!

I felt horrible. There is nothing worse than sitting in a room full of mothers with young children, with a kid that keeps vomiting. I just hope Bug didn't infect all those babies with whatever he has. (Or had...I can't decide it he is over it yet.)

But, I will tell you what...it is making me sick just thinking about it. Ugh...I can't wait until I get to the second trimester and this all goes away! And I am SOOOOO SORRY to all those women who deal with pregnancy nausea through the whole 9 months!