Intestinal Revenge

Warning: This may be one of my less enjoyable posts...especially if you are reading during a meal! 

A couple weeks ago, I enjoyed some pepper jack cheese. I -love- pepper jack cheese. Unfortunately, whenever I eat jalapenos, Gizmo get the most disgustingly stinky poop and farts known to all mankind. It's actually quite amazing how a little bit of pepper can affect him so strongly...though my milk.

Nonetheless, I ate my burger with pepper jack, and Gizmo enjoyed a raisin, a green olive, and some bread.

Then, just over a day later, I sent my hubby on an airplane to Texas for a week...and Gizmo started having diarrhea. Stinky, mucous-y, blood-tinged diarrhea. I was near tears thinking about spending any amount of time with a sick kid and an absent husband.

But I was unsure what was really going on in those little baby intestines. Jalapenos had never caused such a bad reaction before. Could it have been the raisin? The olive? Those were new food items for Gizmo. Maybe it was a triple whammy of pepper/raisin/olive distress. Or was it a virus? Whatever it was, I hoped it would quickly get better. And as I Googled, I got more worried about the presence of blood in my kiddo's dipe...and I got more prepared to make a visit to the pediatrician.

But the runs kept coming. And then came the diaper rash on top of it. We were not a happy mother/baby pair.

Then, after a couple days of pain-in-the-butt diaper changes, out came a hard, solid....popcorn kernel! And all the sudden, the symptoms started clearing up. After going though nearly a whole (and huge, I might add) box of diapers, and a whole tube of Desitin...things started to get better.

I can easily blame my husband for this horribly exhausting mishap....because I am never the one that makes the popcorn in our home (and I -very, very rarely- eat it). But, that lucky guy, he didn't have to change a single one of those wretched diapers.

Finally February

January this year has been particularly exhausting to me. Recovering from the holiday madness, dabbling in potty training, and a full week of sickness has made blogging the last thing that I get around to. On the bright side, however, I have been getting really good at keeping the house mostly clean, keeping the laundry in check, and cooking dinner. The hubs usually cooks dinner...he's just better at it...but the week he was sick, I had to do the cooking. And I haven't stopped yet. Someday, maybe I'll be completely domestic, scrapbook and all.

Bug has finally been shooting forward in the language department. Most of the time, I know what he is saying. Most of the time. Unfortunately, he uses the "f" sound a lot. He doesn't say his t's or sh's. He replaces them with an "f", and it sounds like he is swearing more often that I wish it did! He loves putting his books on the floor to build a "fwain fwack" and he loves watching the movie "Fwek".

Gizmo is getting so big. His gums are bumping up where his little teeth are trying to push through. He is drooling buckets and buckets of spit daily. And he is trying so hard to sit up. And he wants to eat food. Gizmo really knows how to make me feel bad when I'm eating in front of him. He stares at my food and reaches for it. And stares. And stares. And stares. We'll be having fun with eating banana and avocado later this month, for sure! Yesterday, he had a huge poopy blowout diaper, and as I was undressing him, I ended up getting poop everywhere. I was trying to wipe him off the best I could before I gave him a bath, and he was laughing the whole time. He might be less hyperactive than Bug, but he is still a boy!

The Hubs and I finally got a kid-free date this year (our last one was mid-December). We ended up just running errands after going to dinner. The Hubs says that he doesn't consider that a very good date. But I think it's great! Going to the grocery store with my husband, without towing along two kids, feeling accomplished for getting something important done, and having my hair and makeup done while doing it....yeah...that's a pretty good date!

Beginning a New Year

Last night, I had a dream that we bought a house. It wasn't the nicest house, but it had enough room. And two kitchens. With 5 stoves (with ovens) and 4 dishwashers.

When I woke up, I couldn't decide if that would be a good thing, or just more to clean.

Aside from keeping up with my blog, I think I've started off the new year fairly well. I went to bed before midnight on New Years Eve, which is a good habit, I assure you. I've kept my [one] kitchen clean. The ever-increasing laundry has been kept at bay. And I'm pretty sure the house has been vacuumed once.

And then I started Round Two of potty training for Bug. Round One didn't go well. After cleaning up half a dozen accidents per day, I gave up on day 3. THIS TIME, I've only cleaned up 4 accidents total, and we're on day 3...and I haven't given up yet. Although, Bug refuses to poop in the toilet. He can squeeze out one nanoliter of urine to get a sticker on his potty chart...but he won't poop for candy. So, on day one...he just didn't poop. Then yesterday, he went and hid in his room to do it. I assure you all, the first time he poops in the potty will be a day of much rejoicing in our home!

Gizmo is growing like crazy. I'm pretty sure I have February 24th marked on the calender for his 6 month mark and subsequently the Day of Starting Solid Foods. He wants to eat solids so badly right now. He watches us so closely when we eat, it makes me feel bad. Like he's staring at me wondering why I would torture him like that. But I'm sticking to my grounds. He's healthy and growing, he doesn't need solids yet, and I don't want to mess up his little baby intestines. Also...he's been teething. Normally, Gizmo is the most mild and lovable baby in the whole wide world. Recently, he's been a cranky little booger. Sometimes. He is surprisingly happy and easy to settle, even when he is cranky...as long as I stand up with him. But I'm so used to him being incredibly easy and good that whenever he cries it is all that more upsetting!

It's been fun having two kids. Seeing how they are similar. And how they are different. Being a mom is great!

The Pregnant Woman, Her Tender Parts...and The Bathroom

"And remember, this is for posterity. So, please be honest."

This post has been classified TMI. Continue reading at your own risk.

When you get pregnant, there are a lot of things people just happen to "forget" to tell you. Of course, a lot of people don't want to ruin the euphoria of pregnancy, so they just smile and nod at you...knowing that you'll figure it out eventually. This is especially true for the relationship with a pregnant woman, her tender parts and her bathroom. Sure, every book about pregnancy mentions the increased need to pee, but that's only the beginning.

When I was pregnant with Bug, I didn't really have an increased need to pee. I had good, strong pelvic floor muscles, and a confidant bladder. When I was pregnant with Bug, I didn't have too many issues with anything dealing with the bathroom. Whether from the luck of craving bran flakes for breakfast every morning, or the joys of a first pregnancy, I may never know. 

I have not had such blessings with this pregnancy. I seem to have acquired a bladder the size of a pin head. And I have acquired hemorrhoids the size of Alaska. Those vulgar varicosities haven't even had the decency to stay where they "belong". My whole nether region is swollen and tender. It was tolerable until about week 30...when I sat in a car for 16 hours to Texas and 16 hours back. Not recommended. Since then, the baby keeps growing and pressing, my blood volume keeps increasing, and my veins keep begging for mercy. Sleeping with an ice pack in my crotch has never been such a welcoming idea!

With all the horrors that are going on within and around my digestive system (i.e., heartburn, alternating constipation/diarrhea, urinary incontinence, varicose veins) I've learned a few important items to keep well stocked during pregnancy. 

Antacids. I chew Tums like candy. I have a feeling they aren't the most effective way to eliminate heartburn, but I'm a cheap-o...and I have a HUGE bottle of the little buggers. So, they'll have to do.

Toilet paper. Lots of it. More than you think. A nice, soft, thick, -very- absorbent kind. Let's face it, you're going to be dabbing at your lady bits a lot throughout your pregnancy. It helps to have a toilet paper that you like. Increased usage, paired with things getting messy, you'll thank yourself for getting the good stuff. And getting lots of it! Also, make sure you always have a couple rolls stashed in the bathroom. There is nothing fun about stumbling into the bathroom at 4am and tinkling just enough to necessitate even a meager two squares, to find an empty roll....because you used the last two squares at 3am. (Not to mention, you are relieved you even made it to the bathroom on time. After laying in bed for six minutes, deciding that "yes" you do have to go. Then figuring out a way to get out of bed...I'm not sure how I ever manage it. Then taking three minutes to go three steps, because you have to test out if your hips will even hold your weight. Yes, you are relieved that you made it to the toilet, but you are -seriously- considering just sleeping in adult diapers and letting go without having to even roll over!)

Relaxation techniques. Constipation is horrible. It's even worse when you feel like every poop is turning your whole body inside out through your bum! And a big baby head is pushing on your rectum. Just learn to take a deep breath, keep your mouth and lips loose and blow out (like a horse). Keep your feet flat on the floor. I like to think of this as training for the birth. (Birth itself, to me, felt like the biggest BM I've ever had!)

Baby wipes. For you. When you have hemorrhoids, you will realize how important this is! Even the softest toilet paper feels like sandpaper when your insides are coming out. Plus, a little moisturized wipe does cleaning wonders when you are dealing with pregnant-woman-sweaty-crotch in the dead heat of summer.

Panty liners. Or just lots of panties. This is one recommendation that I haven't followed on my own, but I wish that I did (I wish I had 70 gazillion pairs of underwear so I -could- follow this advice). Changing a liner or your underwear will make you feel much better. Excess mucous excretions and sweaty crotch are -not- pleasant. It feels nice to freshen up a bit. Baby wipes are good, but you can't beat fresh, clean underwear!

So, there you have it. The down and dirty on pregnancy bathroom needs. And just so you know, it is definitely ok to pee in the shower.

Why I hate Cheerios

Anybody remember my "Banana Poop" post? (Which gets a surprisingly high number of hits from searches, by the way!) Well, banana poop is like a fresh spring breeze in comparison to...

Cheerio poop.

Now, Bug has been eating the little round O's of oaty goodness for quite a while. He actually prefers the honey nut variety (which I willingly buy, because I'll eat them, too). For the past several months, Bug has actually succeeded in eating a toddler-sized bowl of cereal for breakfast, complete with a couple tablespoons of milk in the bottom of the bowl. He even uses a spoon...er....usually. Some mornings, he will eat oatmeal, which he actually loves! Some mornings, I (or, more likely, the hubby) get fancy and make eggs, toast, hash browns, bacon, ad nauseum. But, Bug doesn't eat the eggs. Some mornings, I make crumb cake, which I promise is a legitimate breakfast, or pancakes. Some mornings, I peel the kid a banana. But, most mornings, I give Bug a bowl of honey nut flavored, toasted oat O's.

And, most afternoons, I regret it.

I don't know how to honey nut coat it, but it causes the most horrendous diaper changes...other than those other horrendous kinds, because we all know if there are solid foods making poop, it is never pretty. Let me just give you a brief idea of how it goes: mom sits down with a full container of wipes and a fresh diaper. Mom opens up diaper and uses one wipe. Two wipes. Three wipes. Four wipes. Five wipes...By this time, mom starts weighing the cost/benefit of just sticking the kiddo in the shower for a while. Mom figures she will try two more wipes. Please note that majority of the poop was wiped off that cute little bum with only two wipes. The remaining wipes are being used to try to remove the stubbornly sticky poop flecks. The damning characteristic of Cheerio poop. Mom wipes. They stay. Mom wipes again. They move over an inch, but do not come off the kiddo's rear. Mom wipes with a pinching technique. Two come off. Twelve million remain. Seven wipes later, mom sticks kid in the shower. Mom remembers next time to not sit down with a fresh diaper and wipes, but to go straight for the fresh diaper and towel.

You'd think I would just stop feeding him Cheerios for breakfast...and snacks throughout the day. But it's the easiest, cheapest, cleanest, minimal prep, most devoured snack/meal that I can find. What can I say? I'm a lazy mom. And Bug loves those showers.

Can't a girl get a nap?

Since the vomiting episode, life hasn't gotten much easier. Bug is...better. Of course, I'm not sure if that is the best way to describe it. He did have diarrhea for a couple days after the upchucking. And we ran out of laundry. And I was too tired to do it. THAT day, the day the earth pretty much imploded on itself, I was the one that was really sick. And not just "I'm pregnant and feel crummy all the time" sick. It was way worse.

I began the day at 4:45am. I got up and went to the bathroom to empty my stomach contents into our toilet. It was the first time this pregnancy. Then, I went back to sleep. Only to get up a little after 6am. Apparently, someone hit the repeat button, and I was in the bathroom again. Before I knew it, we were all up for the day.

I was tired. My stomach was cramping. And I didn't want to eat anything. I knew that pregnancy sickies can be made to go away (for at least a short amount of time) by eating. I tried to eat. I got down a banana. Then I had to change a diaper. A really bad diaper. And I had to change the little pants that kept that bad diaper from getting all over my carpet.

The I ate one cracker, changed another bad diaper and fished around for the only clean pair of pants for Bug. I couldn't find the pants. I looked around the house. I saw a massively destroyed living room, a kitchen piled high with stinky and dirty dishes, dirty laundry smeared with crusty poop and vomit overflowing from the hamper....and I thought about how tired and horrible I felt....then I lost it. I cried and cried.

I didn't know what to do, so I called the husband and bawled to him about how miserable I was and I begged him to come home. So, he did.

While he was on his way home, I ate one baby carrot, and crawled into bed with Bug. We were napping when he arrived. When we woke up, the dishes were done, the living room was clean, the laundry was being done. My husband is obviously a super human, one of a kind, hunk of a hero! Gosh, I love that man! He even went and got me a roast beef sandwich...even though I was only able to take three bites.

Since that day, I have been feeling better. I still feel like crap, but it's the better kind. The normal pregnant kind. I'm a little bit better at handling all the messes. For instance, I haven't cried once since that day, even though every time I go to take a nap, Bug refuses to join me and instead causes mischief around the house. Mischief like emptying bags of cereal or brown sugar onto the kitchen floor. And I was actually able to laugh when Bug stacked three -glass- cups on top of each other at my parents' house.

Toddlers sure are full of energy. It doesn't always make a good match with a mother who is so un-full of energy it is laughable! But, today, we sat down together and starting watching Tarzan, and I had tears of joy and love come to my eyes. I was reminded that even though things are really difficult right now, I love my family. I love this little boy that I helped to create. And I love my husband who works to hard for us. And I'm so excited for the little baby that will be joining us.

Now, if only I could get a nap!

IBS

I suffer from IBS.

No, not that IBS. I suffer from Inferior Blog Syndrome. It is a lot more common than you probably think. Symptoms include red eyes (from staring at the computer screen too much, trying to think of something great to blog about), back aches (from sitting at the computer too long, trying to think of something great to blog about), head aches (from trying to think of something great to blog about), the irrational fear that your blog isn't worth reading (whether this is legitimate or a delusion is to be determined on an individual basis), frequent writer's block (due to the irrational fear) and the constant desire that something great will happen that you can blog about, almost to desperation (may be made manifest in simple sayings, such as, "I'm gonna blog about that!" to nearly every life event). Et cetera, et cetera.

My condition is such that I spend most some of my days begging my son to do something worth blogging about. Something funny. Something not depressing. Something not very negative. Something that won't dissuade Future Mama from having a Future Kiddo. And for goodness sake, PLEASE, something that DOESN'T have to do with poop or pee and my carpet!!!

Yet, my condition persists. Bug continues to ruin diaper-free time by harassing my carpet with all matter of foulness. (Which often necessitates turning on the bath water AGAIN just seconds after I got him dried off from his previous washing.)

He just seems so vile sometimes. He looks at me with suspicious innocence then takes a hit from his water-filled sippy cup. It seems as if he is intentionally trying to worsen my condition.

And when Bug actually does something that I feel like I can get a really good story out of (with minimal exaggeration) he SOMEHOW, SOMEWAY keeps me from writing it as eloquently as I so desire. So that when I reread the post that is supposed to bring in readers from near and far, it seems sad and deflated. I'm usually left to hold down the backspace key, muttering to myself, "This story is stoooopid. Was that even funny when it happened?! Nobody will think this is funny other than me and my husband. Or just me. Gosh, if the whole world had just been there, then they would think it was hilarious. But then they wouldn't want to read about it my blog, because they have already seen it..." You get the point.

And that's why I'm not even going to try to tell you about the other night, when Bug climbed up and into the cart on his shopping cart walker toy and sat there, perched, looking at mom and dad with the look on his face that said all of the following: Look what I did. Wow, I'm really high up here. Am I allowed to be here? Even if I'm not, here I am, so HA! I bet I can climb onto the coffee table from here. Oh, mom's starting to get worried. I know I'm such a daredevil. Oh, now mom is ordering dad to get me down. No, you stay there, I'll get down myself. Crud, how do I get down myself? Relax, it's ok. I figured it out. Oooohhh yeah....I'm gonna do that again when you're not looking!!!

Ok, I guess I will tell you. I can only lament that the camera batteries were dead.

Darn that IBS!

Uh, eeew.

*Warning: This post may be highly disturbing to those with a weak constitution.*

I am one of those people who think that all the best stories have to do with poop. As you may recall from my lame-o April Fool's day post, I have been in a blogging slump. This morning I learned, all you have to do is wait....and the good stories will come to you.

Every morning, Bug wakes slightly and has his morning dose of mother's milk while still in bed. Then, he usually sits up and starts laughing/growling/pulling my hair until I get up and out of bed. THEN, he has his morning poop.

Really, he doesn't have a morning poop every morning, but most...so, in our family, we refer to it as "the morning poop". Now, "the morning poop" is usually very interesting. Usually, it includes little bits and pieces from what he has been eating lately. And, usually, there is a lot of it (because he has been storing it up -usually- from the morning before.)

Anyway...I try not to change his morning diaper until AFTER "the morning poop", because the poop comes pretty quickly after getting out of bed, and I don't want to change his diaper twice, one right after the other. (Maybe I should seriously start looking into elimination communication.)

Well, this morning, Bug and I get out of bed and do some morning stretches. I go pee. I pull on my nice, comfy, long-sleeved tee and I plop Bug down on a changing mat. I grab another diaper, and the wipes and open up the diaper. [Now, as a side note, Bug HATES diaper changes. He LOATHES them. DESPISES them.] Bug is trying to wiggle away from me. I am holding him down as best as I can. Then, like lightning, he grabs hold of the front of his diaper and PULLS IT STRAIGHT UP over his head. The weight of the diaper is pulling it down, and "the morning poop"........oh, this is horrible.........leaves a trail the whole way. It was everywhere, I tell you, EVERYWHERE. On his butt, in his crotch, on his belly, on his shirt, on his nose, on his forehead, and on my carpet. And, I think, a little in his mouth, too (emphasized by Bug sticking out his tongue and spitting). And because I'm a good mom, I made sure to get a picture:


So, this morning, I waited a little bit longer to eat my yummy, homemade cinnamon rolls, and I went straight to the bathroom to give the little guy a bath. With lots of soap.

Oh, the HORROR!

Bug thinks that diaper changes are the equivalent of being tortured in the 7th circle of Hell.

I'm beginning to think so, too!

Banana Poop

Now that Bug is 6 months old, we have decided that it is OK to start him on solids. YAY! Since my hubby works for Chiquita, and we get bananas every Tuesday, Bug's first solid food was....banana! Naturally. Of course, I am still nursing every minute of every hour of every day every week (or something like that). I am just introducing Bug to chewing, kind of. And swallowing thicker foods. At least I think he is swallowing. Well, yeah, he is swallowing, just not very much and not very well.

I am SO glad that I had just finished reading up online about feeding babies solid foods, or else the whole "banana poop" thing would have totally freaked me out. Let me tell you a little bit about banana poop. Anyone who has every made or had banana bread should be able to figure out what I am going to try to explain. If you haven't had any experience with banana bread, and you want to know what I am talking about, you have two options: 1. make/eat some banana bread or 2. change the diaper of a breastfed baby that has eaten banana recently.

Ok, now that I have captured your attention, and you are TOTALLY dying to know what banana poop is, here is the story. I mash up some delicious banana for Bug. I put on his bib (which he is NOT fond of). I spoon some banana into his mouth. He looks at me like I am crazy, but he is not disgusted. Most of the banana comes out as he works it around in his mouth. He loves shoving the spoon into his mouth. I keep filling up the spoon with banana, and he keeps attempting to eat it. Yay for solids! I clean him up and we go on with our day. The next morning, we get up and spend some quality time together. Bug lets out his usual morning poop noises. I ask him, "Do you need a diaper change!?!" (In the lovely mother-ease voice that we always use.) Bug smiles HUGELY. So, off to the diaper changing station I have set up in the bedroom. I get everything ready and open up the dirty diaper. It is the same lovely yellow/orange color that breastfed baby poop happens to be. But wait?!?! There appear to be little brown stringy things inside there too! This is where the banana bread knowledge comes into play. You know how banana bread has those brown stringy things in it. Yeah. Well, apparently a baby's digestive track is a lot like an oven, and it does the same thing to the delicious banana. Yum!

I keep wondering what pumpkin banana bread batter would look like?

Bumbo is NOT a toilet trainer

When I was a young girl, I hated babysitting. I always figured that having my own kids would be tons different, because I wouldn't have to worry about doing things the "right" or "wrong" way...I could just parent my own children exactly how I wanted. And, you know what, I was right! Another thing I always thought when I was younger was that diaper changing would be the worst part of being a mom. Well, in that case, I was wrong. Diaper changing is probably the easy part!! Erm, well...most of the time.

My wonderful husband, bless his ever-patient heart, bought some more diapers for our baby's busy bum. And, I blame myself completely, he bought a super cheap brand. He did this for two reasons: 1. They're cheap! AND 2. They don't support vaccines! My preferred brand of Pampers spent the month of August using money from packs of diapers bought to send vaccines to pregnant women. I know I don't agree with vaccines, but I have my reasons for wanting those wonderful diapers. The first reason is that, with the cheap diapers, I can't tell when Bug's butt is wet until my lap is also! They are so thick (which is very deceiving, because you would think that would keep them from leaking as much...I hate to break it to you though, they probably leak more than any other diaper!) But, I can handle urine leaks, especially baby ones, because baby urine isn't as bad as adult urine. And even adult urine isn't too bad, unless it's leaking when it shouldn't be, which I may or may not have had experience with in late pregnancy/early postpartum.

Anyway, the real kicker for not wanting cheap diapers comes from the other form of excrement my son so generously produces. Breastfed baby poop, as I've said before, is not 100% disgusting. I think that is a blessing from God, because He knows how often parents end up with poop on themselves. So, I had Bug in a cheap diaper, and had him sitting in his Bumbo chair while I prepared my lunch. I heard some poop noises, but thought nothing much of it. Bug has pooped while sitting in his Bumbo before, and the only problem it caused before (while he was wearing my beloved Pampers) was that the poop came up around his male parts and I had to use an extra wipe or two to get the job done. However...in the cheap diapers, I should have expected a much more disastrous result. When I pulled Bug out of his chair, there was poop ALL OVER his butt, completely covering the bottom half of the outfit I had just put him in 15 minutes earlier. Luckily, the Bumbo wipes clean fairly well, and we have a gazillion onesies for Bug to wear. Needless to say, I made a call to my hubby to pick up some non-cheap diapers on his way home from work.

Little Stinker

Even through all my crunchy ways, I have not yet been converted to the superior green-ness of cloth diapering. I finally have a washer and dryer in my apartment, so I can't use that excuse any longer. (And, even with my aversion to vaccines, I still buy the vaccine-supporting Pampers, simply because...I think they work best with me and my baby. I am a selfish mother.) Maybe someday I will brave the cloth diapers, but as for now, I deal with throwing away all the baby poop.

For all those mothers who breastfed for any amount of time (past meconium, that is) you know what that poop is like. Incredibly runny, yellow, and "what the heck is he eating that makes those little curds?". There once was a time when I didn't realize I should wait until I heard at least 3 poop squirts before changing Bug. This was a time when all those hormones were making me crazy. Well, I guess that is all the time, so never mind that. Bug had most likely just finished a meal, and he began to fill his diaper...as most breastfed babies like to do immediately post-meal. I smile and cheerfully place him on a changing mat (I can find no place or point for a changing table in my apartment) to fulfill my duty as mother and change my little guy's bum. I remove diaper, with one squirt size of poop in it, and I am wiping those plump little cheeks when I receive squirt number two...directly into my palm-up, wet-wipe holding hand. Surprisingly, I was able to laugh about it. I got both myself and Bug cleaned up and put a fresh diaper on the baby. Now, I can proudly say I have joined the ranks of surviving mothers who have been pooped on. It is a honor I bear with respect.

Warm and Wet

All those who shower with their babies know that it can both be easier and harder at the same time. Easier, because you know you are going to get soaked anyway, might as well strip down and shower. Harder...well, here's just one example of how it's harder: I had just gotten Bug and myself ready to step into the shower when he starts crying and complaining of severe hunger ("Didn't I just feed you 10 minutes ago!?!"). So, I do what any good mother would do, I sit down on the closest chair, aka The Toilet, and nurse my naked son. My husband walks in and laughs at me, while I try to explain that I am NOT using the toilet, I'm just sitting here nursing. I give an exasperated sigh as he gives me a grin that says "He just HAD to eat, huh?" Hubby knows I'm a sucker and will nurse at the slightest little whine Bug gives me. And just as I am joking to my hubby that Bug will probably pee on me, I find myself warm and wet. Hey! I haven't even turned the shower on yet. I quickly jump into the tub to save the bathroom floor from a serious need of mopping. I finish up nursing, covered in pee, and then proceed to shower myself and the little tinkler. At least he didn't poop on me.