Friday, December 26, 2008
Well, Christmas 'tis the season for sugar and sweets. And lots of junk left on the floor. My family went to my in-law's house on Christmas day, and Bug was sitting on the floor as we all opened our family gifts. My brother-in-law had left his stash of candy from that morning on the floor, just next to where Bug was sitting. Of course, Bug found a nice piece of butterscotch candy to mouth. I wasn't too worried about it. It was still in the wrapper, and Bug had a good hold of it. I kept my eye on him, to make sure that he didn't lose his grip. Eventually, we all thought that Bug might be enjoying the taste of that candy wrapper a little bit too much. Even though I had just checked a minute ago, and the wrapper was all intact, I checked again....
And what do you know, Bug had torn a little hole in the wrapper, and was sucking on that little piece of butterscotch candy!!!! I took it right away from him, and tried to give him something else to play with. He was not happy with that, at all! He screamed and screamed! I felt like a horrible mom, and a total hypocrite for allowing Bug to eat candy (especially because I gave MY mom a hard time just the other day about giving Bug some mashed potatoes that had butter and milk in them!) Luckily, I was able to laugh about the situation. And apparently, butterscotch is even better than mama's milk!
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Today, I was on the floor playing with Bug. We rolled his ball, crawled around and read through his little alphabet book. And, of course, he tried to put everything in his mouth. Because he puts everything in his mouth, he often has strings of saliva running from his mouth to whatever happens to be in his hands at the moment. After we read his alphabet book, Bug pulled his mouth away (I swear, if we had Braille books, he would read them with his tongue!) and his string of spit disconnected from the book, and was hanging down from his mouth about three inches. Bug happened to notice, for once, that there was something hanging there. He tried his hardest to grab the string. But he swayed and missed, because he was only supported with one hand. Then he tried again, and missed again. He happened to miss with every swipe, while I tried not to distract him with my muffled giggles. He eventually gave up, and put something else into his mouth. If he did manage to get a hold of that daggone spit strand, though, you bet he would have put it right into his mouth!
Friday, December 12, 2008
So, my little family lives in a crappy apartment. Every day I spend here at home, I hate it even more. Just the other day, to brighten my mood, they turned the water off....for the eighth time in 4 months. Just perfect for a stay-at-home mom, you know!? I can't do the dishes, or laundry (Oh, the diapers!!!!), or use the restroom, or even cook for that matter! Luckily, my little sister was able to come and get me and Bug, and take us over to my parents' house.
We put the car seat in her little car, and drove away. [Just a side note: We use a convertible car seat, not an infant car seat.] When we were about halfway to my parents' house (it is only a 15 minute drive away, so it wasn't that long) I looked back at Bug....
I had to do a little scream, because Bug's car seat WAS LEANING PRACTICALLY SIDEWAYS!!!!! What the heck!?!?! I reached back and corrected it, and held it in place the rest of the way. I went over and over in my mind how I buckled it in and tightened everything, and made sure everything was in place. Why on earth would it lean over like that?!? And more than that, why didn't Bug alert me when he toppled over?!?!
Once we got to my parents' house, I checked the seat. It was still buckled in correctly. I'm not exactly sure why it DID lean over. But everyone was safe. And why didn't Bug let me know what was going on? Well, of course, because he was fast asleep!
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
My mother-in-law is convinced that Bug knows what he means when he says "mama", because he said it while he was "distressed". I can't seem to agree, though. Maybe it's because I'm home with Bug all day, and I hear him calling me while he is crawling toward his ball. (I guess "baba" isn't even the word for "ball".) True, he does say it when he is upset. He will crawl up to me, crying and whining in his cute voice, "mama". But, he doesn't stop saying it after I've picked him up. And he continues saying it when he wants me to put him down.
I never thought my baby's first word (and I'm hesitant to even call it that), would make me want to pull my hair out! I have, more or less, come to the conclusion that "mama" means "nap time". For both of us!
Friday, December 5, 2008
Every day, I am home with Bug. All day, every day. I do get some breaks. Like when my husband watches Bug so I can take a shower all by myself! And we do get a date night about once a month, when we dump Bug off at one of his grandmothers' houses. But, more or less, I am with the kid 24/7. And I mostly love it. I get to know him better than anyone else. I see all facets of his personality. I get to teach him. I get to cuddle with him. I get to see all of his firsts....but apparently, I don't bring them out in him. That would be Papa's job.
I don't know how many times I got Bug down on his hands and knees and knelt down in front of him, encouraging him to "Come to Mama!" I guess that's when he learned how to crawl backward. He was stuck in reverse for several weeks. And still I trained and encouraged him to go forward. Then, one day when my husband got home from work, Bug was trying his hardest to crawl forward to him. He moved his hands. And he moved his little legs. He scooted. He went down onto his belly in his classic "Superman" pose. He got back up, and crawled just a little bit more to his Papa. Oh, how my heart nearly melted. It was very exciting! And I guess Bug gets just as happy for Daddy to be home as I do!
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Once we are completely exhausted, and totally ready for Bug to go to sleep, we all lay down in the bed. I prepare to nurse Bug into a blissful state of sleep. He has other plans....especially if he is in between mama and papa. He turns nursing into a game, and I must admit, it is pretty darn cute!
Here are the rules to the game: nurse for 5 seconds. Pull off, make sure to stretch mommy as far as she can go while doing it. Look over at daddy. Smile the biggest grin you can manage. Turn away from daddy quickly, pretending like you are Bashful, the dwarf. Remember to give a little giggle while you are turning! Latch back onto mommy. Bonus points for making a big slurping noise. Begin again, this time, nurse for only 4 seconds and laugh with even more cuteness. Each round, nurse for one second less, and amp up the adorable factor. When you run out of seconds to nurse, then you can nurse longer and finally go to sleep...but not until after you make mommy switch sides.
Luckily, the game hasn't yet added a biting rule, even though Bug got his two bottom teeth in about two weeks ago! Mommy will have to add a penalty if those pearly whites turn dangerous!
Thursday, November 27, 2008
This Challenge is to list 365 things that I am thankful for. I have divided up all my items into categories. Each category lists the things I am thankful for, related specifically to the category heading. Things that seem to be re-listed, may just be me expressing my gratitude for the item in a different way. This list is in no way inclusive! The more I think about it, the more things I am grateful for...but I am only going to 365 things, here and now. I have added lots of links to lots of the interesting things I am thankful for. And, of course, the link to the one who started it all, The Mommy Bee:
1. Husband, S. He is my best friend, and I love him!
2. Son, Bug. He helps me appreciate everything about life.
5. Sister 1
6. Sister 2
7. Sister 3
10. All of my in-law siblings (it would be too much to list them all!)
11. Grandpa P
12. Grandma P
13. Step-grandma P (my grandpa got remarried after my grandmother passed away)
14. Grandma N
15. Grandpa N
19. Newborn babies
20. Hubby hugs
21. Date night
22. Family Home Evening
24. Holiday get-togethers
25. Family pictures
26. Living close to family
27. Family traditions
28. Built-in best friends (siblings)
29. Shoulders to cry on
30. Family History
31. Free babysitters
32. Massages from hubby
43. Rubik’s cube
46. Reading music
47. Humoring others
49. Driving a stick shift
53. Giving service
55. Playing with Bug
56. Showing passion in my interests
59. Being good at everything I try
60. Being compassionate
61. Loving others
62. Identifying wildflowers
64. Voice books
65. Sewing machine
66. Wool yarn
67. “Just lookin’ downright hot” says hubby
68. Two computers
69. Nice printer
70. Fast Internet connection
71. Cell phones
72. Gaming system
73. Tons of movies
75. DVD player
76. Tons of CD’s
77. Microwave oven
78. Toaster oven
80. Washer/dryer in the apartment
81. Two bedroom apartment
82. Bumbo chair
83. Lots of toys for Bug
84. Lots of toys for hubby
85. Piano keyboard
86. Huge bed
87. Garbage disposal
88. Paper towels
89. Link sausage
90. Hand held vacuum “dust buster”
92. Bebe au Lait nursing cover
93. Getting to eat out
94. Glock 19
95. 600 thread count sheets
96. Cord-a-Roy kind sized beanbag chair/bed
97. 8 cookie sheets
98. Pfaltzgraff dishes
99. Fuzzy socks
100. Coffee table
101. Paper towel holder
102. Good water pressure
103. Slip on shoes
104. Memory foam pillow
105. Calling my hubby my best friend
106. Keeping in touch with friends via the Internet
107. Visiting at friends’ houses
108. Friends with young children
109. Relating to other young moms
110. My relationship with my sisters
111. Visiting Teachers
112. Home Teachers
113. New traditions
114. Sleepovers when I was younger
115. Contacts for learning new things
116. Contacts for sharing information
117. Hanging out
118. Freedom from boredom
119. Sharing interests
120. Hand-me-down clothes for Bug
121. Sharing beliefs
122. Babysitting resources
123. Enjoy pregnancy vicariously until I’m pregnant again
124. Learning new recipes
125. Not having to cook dinner every night
126. Borrowing toys
127. Getting out of my own house
128. Sharing movies
129. Inside jokes
130. Having a listening ear
131. Being able to help others
132. Giving advice
133. Receiving advice
134. Getting help when moving
135. Appreciation of talents
136. Rice cooker (and rice)
137. Bran flakes cereal (This got me through my pregnancy with Bug!)
139. Cheddar cheese
140. 2% Milk
142. Jungle Jim’s
143. Baking powder
146. Wheat bread
149. Homemade tomato soup with grilled cheese
150. Eating out at Acapulco (our favorite Mexican Restaurant)
151. Eating out at China Town Buffet
152. Eating out at O’Charlies (best rolls EVER!)
153. Fresh pumpkin pie
154. Cooking nearly everything from scratch
155. Kroger brand Egg nog
156. Crock Pot meals
157. Ground beef
158. Frozen chicken
160. Sunday breakfast made my hubby
161. Homemade chili
162. Cream of _____ soups
163. Candy treats
164. Three meals a day
165. Warm Jell-O
166. Milk chocolate
167. Baby spoons
168. Baby bibs
170. Homemade fudge
172. Attachment parenting
175. Baby smiles
176. Baby firsts
179. Baby wearing
181. Bug’s naps
182. My future children
183. Possibilities of adoption
184. Joy that parenting brings
185. Play time
186. Reading to Bug
187. Quality time
188. Growing teeth
189. Learning to crawl
190. Teaching opportunities
191. Cool toys
192. Baby laughs and noises
193. Bath time (or shower time, rather)
194. Feeling like an adult
195. Being able to love so much
196. To be called “mama”
197. To call hubby “papa”
198. Taking responsibility of child’s health
199. Better understanding of MY mother
200. Learning to listen to my own body
201. Finding new things to teach Bug
203. Bug flirting
204. When Bug wakes up happy
205. Nursing pads
206. Baby carriers
207. Unassisted Childbirth, even though I haven’t done it yet.
214. CD players
215. Air conditioners
217. Baby monitors
220. Busing systems
221. Digital cameras
223. Cell phones
229. Video games
231. Electric heating
235. Lights (especially LED)
236. Rechargeable batteries
237. DVD player
241. Talented and Gifted programs
244. Associate’s Degree
245. High School Diploma
246. Almost having my Bachelor’s
247. Research experience
249. Simple math
250. Appreciation of reading
251. Introductions to Classic literature
252. Improved writing skills
253. Job opportunities
254. Language experience
255. Child development
257. First Aid
258. Self defense
259. Family structures
260. Text books to reference
263. “word-a-day” books
264. Southern State Community College
265. Miami University
266. Good professors
267. Public speaking opportunities
268. How to manage money
269. Hubby getting to go to the University of Cincinnati
270. Future homeschooling
272. Counter top space
274. Bookshelves full of books
276. Internet access
277. Kitchen table
280. California King sized bed
283. Toilet (and toilet paper!)
290. Personal space
294. Four seasons
295. Green trees
296. Lightening bugs
298. Country roads
299. The Constitution of the Unites States of America
300. Colorful drinking cups
301. Water/Fire proof safe
302. Light switches
303. Headboard wide enough to hold a cup of water
304. Drawers that slide well
305. Lactational amenorrhea
308. Shampoo/Conditioner (even though I don’t use it regularly)
309. Face wash/moisturizer
310. Bar soap
311. Deodorant (mine AND Scotty’s)
312. Minimal doctor visits
313. No vaccines for Bug
315. Nasal spray
317. Clean clothes to wear
318. Petroleum Jelly (for my super dry skin)
319. Cleaning supplies
320. Doctors—when we need them
321. My ability to give birth
322. Puffs Plus lotion tissues
324. Colloidal silver
325. Breast milk
326. Warm coats
327. Clean water
328. Plenty of food
329. Never had a broken bone
330. Nail clippers
331. Easy pregnancy with Bug
332. No major health problems
333. Kitchen gloves
334. Plants that are hard to kill
Religion (Learn More!)
335. God, my Heavenly Father
336. Jesus Christ
337. Holy Ghost
338. The Atonement
339. The Plan of Happiness
342. Personal revelation
343. The Priesthood
347. The Book of Mormon
349. Pearl of Great Price
350. Church Magazines
353. Temple ordinances
357. Relief Society
359. Continued revelation
360. Priesthood blessings
361. Fellow shipping with Saints
362. Eternal families
364. Hymns and Holiday music
365. My RM hubby
Wednesday, November 26, 2008
And when Daddy gets home, Mommy is pooped. And SOMEHOW, Bug is just full of smiles.
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Anyway, I would like to put forth my ever friendly reminder to -Please Research- babywearing. There are studies that show babies that are worn cry less, grow up to be more independent, and (believe it or not) are smarter! Plus, it feels so great to have your baby close by! There are TONS of fancy carriers to choose from, or you can just use a simple piece of cloth. I, myself, have a ring sling, a mei tai, and a couple of wraps. I love my wraps the best. And, I have made everything myself, so I didn't break the bank just to wear my baby.
There are so many reasons to wear your baby, I can't even begin to list them. If you wear your baby correctly, it should NOT hurt. There is a learning curve for using carriers, especially those like wraps. But, once you figure it out, you can get so much more done while you are wearing your little loved one! People all around the world wear their babies! It's sad that our Western culture is just now figuring it out.
Friday, November 14, 2008
You can make your list as big or small as you like. The real challenge is to make a gratitude full list of 365 things, one for each day of the year. You can refer to the Thanksgiving Challenge link for a few ideas on the Challenge and how to organize your list. There is also a script for the button on Mommy Bee's blog, so you can add it to your post and we will all be linked together! Thanks Mommy Bee for this wonderful idea!!
Monday, November 10, 2008
I am SO glad that I had just finished reading up online about feeding babies solid foods, or else the whole "banana poop" thing would have totally freaked me out. Let me tell you a little bit about banana poop. Anyone who has every made or had banana bread should be able to figure out what I am going to try to explain. If you haven't had any experience with banana bread, and you want to know what I am talking about, you have two options: 1. make/eat some banana bread or 2. change the diaper of a breastfed baby that has eaten banana recently.
Ok, now that I have captured your attention, and you are TOTALLY dying to know what banana poop is, here is the story. I mash up some delicious banana for Bug. I put on his bib (which he is NOT fond of). I spoon some banana into his mouth. He looks at me like I am crazy, but he is not disgusted. Most of the banana comes out as he works it around in his mouth. He loves shoving the spoon into his mouth. I keep filling up the spoon with banana, and he keeps attempting to eat it. Yay for solids! I clean him up and we go on with our day. The next morning, we get up and spend some quality time together. Bug lets out his usual morning poop noises. I ask him, "Do you need a diaper change!?!" (In the lovely mother-ease voice that we always use.) Bug smiles HUGELY. So, off to the diaper changing station I have set up in the bedroom. I get everything ready and open up the dirty diaper. It is the same lovely yellow/orange color that breastfed baby poop happens to be. But wait?!?! There appear to be little brown stringy things inside there too! This is where the banana bread knowledge comes into play. You know how banana bread has those brown stringy things in it. Yeah. Well, apparently a baby's digestive track is a lot like an oven, and it does the same thing to the delicious banana. Yum!
I keep wondering what pumpkin banana bread batter would look like?
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Nursing is going to get interesting, I think. Bug hasn't started gnawing (on me) yet. He does chew on everything else, but luckily I haven't been subjected to the teething baby torture. I'm quite nervous about when those teeth actually pop out and he realizes that he has them, and what they can do. Because of the boogery nose, I have to use the "nose sucker" on Bug before he can nurse. If I don't, he pulls off and reattaches over and over again, just to breathe. And fusses. And snorts. No fun. Of course, sucking out the boogers isn't all sugar either. Bug is starting to realize how loudly he can scream. Every little boo-boo, every little string of snot that gets sucked, every little moment of mom not giving attention, he raises his voice to deafening decibels.
I must say though, Bug has been a total trooper through it all so far. Even through the fussiness, he doesn't act like it bothers him all that much. I have to look at the glass half full side on this, because I've been told it could be much worse.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
I am not much of a believer in "well baby" doctor visits. I think it is just a ploy for the doctors to get more money. Nonetheless, I did take my little guy into the the doctor when he was about a week old. (Actually, he was 6 days old when I took him into the office.) I hadn't picked out a pediatrician yet, and I thought it would be better to just pick a family doctor, so the whole family could go to the same doc, if we needed it. So, I just picked a family practice that was relatively close.
I sat in the office and nursed Bug while I was waiting for the doctor to come. She finally arrived, and started checking out my little man. After doing some checking, she asked me, "Do you think your son looks yellow?" I was thinking to myself, through all my postpartum hormonal thoughts, why would she ask ME, if SHE is the doctor!!?! I responded as honestly as I could, "Well, just a little. But I'm around him all the time, so not really. Other people have said he does look a little bit jaundiced." "WELL [said with an I'm-smart-you're-dumb attitude], he is!" She then proceeded to tell me I needed to get his bilirubin levels checked -immediately-! I wasn't too concerned, and I was already going in to take a school final that day (which was a big mistake in in itself), but I told the doctor I would do it, before she totally lost her head. Seriously, she was already formulating a treatment plan!
So, I endured the heel prick and crying of my poor baby boy. I was told that the lab would contact me and the doctor's office within the next 24 hours. The day went by, with a missed call from the doctor, I never got around to calling her back. The next day I get a call from the doctor, again, asking what was going on with the tests. I told her I had no idea. She then lectured to me about how important this was, and how jaundice can cause brain damage. (I later found out that she also called my "emergency number" at my parent's house, because she couldn't get a hold of me on the first try). So I called the lab, and they gave me Bug's bili levels. There were at 12.9-which isn't high enough yet for treatment. I called the doctor to let her know, but she was still wigging out and demanded that I make another appointment with her to get an order for another heel prick for Bug. I was NOT enthused about that idea, and I told her I didn't think it was necessary. She continued to tell me how serious this was, and how important it was, and how dangerous it was. She kept throwing out the brain damage card. I told her I would call later to reschedule an appointment. I didn't.
In the meantime, I did call a pediatrician's office. I asked the nurse about jaundice and bili levels. She said the ped would probably order another test to make sure the levels were going down, but as long as the baby is eating well, pooping regularly, and not lethargic, everything was most likely fine. Well, check, definitely check, and absolutely check all three of those tests. I was confident that Bug would recover from his jaundice in no time, and with no complications.
The next day, the doctor calls me. "Mama, you were supposed to bring Bug in so I could order another test for his jaundice." I was really nervous, because I HATE talking on the phone...plus, I knew I was about to fire this doctor for being an incompetent spaz that loved to harass new mothers. I sucked it up, and tried to keep my voice steady as I told her that I thought she was wrong and unprofessional, that I had contacted another doctor, I would no longer be seeing her, and that she should expect contact soon to transfer Bug's records. She asked me what doctor I was going to take him to (which I later found out is against HIPAA laws for her to ask that. Luckily, I told her that I would not disclose that information!) After a long pause, she said, "Well, I'm just afraid that your son has brain damage." [emphasis added]. EXCUSE ME!?!?! HAS?!?!? Absolutely nothing warrants that! No doctor is going to tell me, without any evidence, that my son HAS brain damage. I sternly told her that I did NOT agree, and then I hung up.
A day or so later, CPS knocks on my door and handed me my Bad Mom Award. Thank you, thank you! I'd like to thank my jaundiced son, and most importantly, my idiot doctor! I couldn't have done it without you!
And the update: Apparently CPS realized that the "concern" was bogus, because I haven't had any trouble with them since. Although, I will remain on record with them for 3 years. Such is life. I did go to the new pediatrician. He is great. Bug hasn't been back since he was just over a month old though, because he is healthy as can be. His jaundice cleared up quickly. And guess what, they haven't called me to tell me that they think my son has brain damage!
[If any readers in my area are interested to know who the idiot doctor is, so they can avoid her, her name is Dr. Cynthia Villacis, with Goshen Family Practice.]
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Our nail clipping routine goes something like this:
Mommy gets baby nail clippers and a paper towel (to put all the clippings onto). Mommy gets baby, makes him laugh, lays him on the floor...this makes him cry. Mommy grabs a toy to make baby laugh again. While baby is distracted with toy, Mommy grabs Baby's hand (the one that doesn't have the toy). Mommy clips one nail, halfway, before Baby notices that something more interesting is going on here than the "distractor" toy. Mommy hands Baby the toy again. Mommy frantically cuts the other half of the first nail, and then clips three more nails. Mommy receives three nail clippings to the eye. Baby then tries to roll over. Mommy rolls Baby back over, and hands baby a different toy, hoping to interest Baby longer. Mommy finishes first hand, and does a little victory dance, while Baby is rolling over. Mommy rolls Baby back over, hands Baby a new toy, and starts on the second hand. Baby will have nothing to do with the toy, or getting his nails clipped. Mommy sits Baby up in her lap to try clipping in a different position. Mommy might as well be trying to clip Baby's nails while standing on her head. Mommy tries four different positions, and goes back to Baby laying on the floor. Mommy hands baby toy. Mommy frantically cuts five nails. Mommy receives five nail clippings to the eye. Mommy moves to feet. Baby decides to kick up a storm. Mommy gets a kick in the gut. Baby rolls over. Mommy rolls Baby back over, and grabs one foot. Mommy successfully cuts all but the big toe. Baby rolls over. Mommy tries to cut nails while Baby is laying on his tummy. She is successful again, even amid the stream of kicks. Mommy receives a nail clipping to the eye. Baby rolls over. Mommy clips the last nail and Baby lays completely still. Mommy picks up the paper towel. It has one and a half nail clippings on it. Mommy doesn't really care, because Baby's nails are finally clipped. And she was planning on vacuuming next month anyway.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Showering used to take me 10 minutes. No less. No more. Now, I bet you I could pull of a 2 minute shower. Especially since I have decided to go the way of No-'Poo. I know, that sounds horrible. It really means not using shampoo. Most people use baking soda and vinegar. I don't have time for that. I just use water. Honestly, it lasted a week before I had to wash my hair. But, I am trying again. Maybe this time I will just cut down on the washes until I can eliminate them completely. I never was good at the cold turkey method...I tried that with sweets once for a couple of months, and then I had a total breakdown and binged! (Yeah, that was during a New Year party, and my mom and I kept saying "We can eat sweets until midnight"...after midnight, it was "We can eat sweets until 1am". You see where this is going.)
And as more children come along, I am sure that I will be shaving the seconds off of my shower time! Speaking of shaving, I don't have time for that anymore either! It's a serious wonder that I don't look like this. I did send my hubby to get a home waxing kit. For me, not the car. We had a little fun with that, until I decided it just isn't worth it. After ripping
All in all, I'm pretty much a frumpy mess of a mom. But, you know what? I love my job, so it's ok.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
I was planning on having an unassisted childbirth (UC). But, to stay on the safe side, I continued having my prenatal appointments with an OB. I never did tell the doctors in the practice that I wasn’t planning on having my baby at their hospital. I was afraid they would refuse to see me, and I wasn’t prepared for an Unassisted Pregnancy (UP). But my heart yearned for a peaceful birth. I believe it is possible to have a good birth in a hospital, but not a peaceful birth. I believe a peaceful birth can only happen at home.
On Wednesday, April 30th, I had a regular, routine prenatal checkup at 2:30pm. My hubby decided he wanted to go with me to this one (maybe because I had been having prodromal labor for a week already!) Although the only other appointments my husband went to were my first appointment and the ultrasound we had done at my 20 week mark (IT’S A BOY!). I did all the basics for the appointment. You know, pee in a cup, stand on the scale (Are you serious!?! 40lbs!!!), strip from the waist down and put that nice little piece of paper over your lap. The doctor said I was about 2cm dilated. I seriously thought it was more than that with all the contractions I had been having for the past week, but I guess that was just wishful thinking! Then the Doc checked my little baby’s heart rate. We heard some irregularities, like a little, extra beat every now and then. Of course, Doc wanted to do a Non-Stress Test. So, they hooked me up to an external fetal heart monitor and contraction monitor. It wasn’t too bad, because I got to sit in a recliner. But I don’t know why they call it a “Non-Stress Test”, because I’m obviously stressing over what is wrong with my baby! The nurse that hooked me up told me to keep an eye on the machine’s light. It was supposed to stay green. It just wasn’t cooperating. Apparently, the monitor wasn't picking up the baby's heart rate well enough, so the Doc wanted me to go over to the hospital for an ultrasound....STAT. So, off we went (and I was so glad hubby had decided to come with me to that appointment!)
We got to the hospital and found where we were supposed to go. Of course, I wasn’t allowed to wear my own clothes. And I had to sit still again for another Non-Stress Test. By this time, I was feeling pretty hungry, because I hadn’t eaten since my lunch at noon. But, then I was transported to have the ultrasound done. Yes, transported...like, in a wheel chair. There is nothing like a hospital for losing your dignity. The only thing I could do to keep from crying was giggle the whole way. We finally get to the ultrasound room, which is NOWHERE near the OB floor, and I get that goop spread all over my big, pregnant belly. It was nice to see the baby again. He looked so wonderful. He moved a lot, but his heart was still beating to a different tune. The poor little guy didn't score all the points he was supposed to for the "test" they were doing. Basically, because of the score of the baby on all the tests, and with how far along I was, it was medically advised that we go ahead and deliver. This wasn't what we wanted, because it meant having the Doc break my water, having an internal fetal monitor, and having the baby in the hospital. It was a long way away from the homebirth I had been planning. But I didn't feel comfortable leaving and not knowing if the baby was ok. So, we talked and prayed about it. I cried. The on-call OB was very nice. She let us take our time as we thought this through. Finally, we decided we were going to be having this baby!
I was able to get a Priesthood blessing (thanks to hubby, dad, and father-in-law). Lots of family, both mine and hubby’s, came to visit us. We spent some time talking. Finally, I felt prepared enough to begin this journey. We called the doctor in and she broke my water. That was nothing like I had imagined it would be...there is a lot of liquid in there!!! The doctor also hooked up an internal fetal monitor. So it began. It was around 9pm, and now I really felt like I was starving. This is the time that I say I started labor...but my mom says it doesn't count until it starts to hurt...which means I really started labor around 11:30pm. But, in the meantime, my family came back in to talk with me for a while longer. My mom always has me laughing, and that was especially fun now that the membranes were ruptured! Every time I laughed it felt like I was peeing my pants!
Soon everyone left, except hubby, my mom, and my two younger sisters. The contractions were starting to get really rough; this must have been 11:30pm, according to my mom!! And according to mom, I was really in labor. I vocalized with moaning through my contractions. It probably sounded like I was dying. But my younger sister was there rubbing my back and being the best labor support ever! Hubby was great too, but I think it was a pretty emotional time for him! I did a really bad job at keeping track of the time. Not that I should have been, I was kind of busy! But, I was impatient. I thought I was in transition one time, only to find I was only 6cm. So, I stuck to laboring away. Finally, I knew I HAD to be in transition! It was so intense, and I almost couldn’t keep from pushing. There were several times that I wasn't sure if I would be able to make it through. That feeling started through the last ten contractions before I was fully dilated. Those were the absolute worst!
Finally, I was 10cm! Hallelujah! Of course, then they told me to hold off pushing if I could, because they wanted to make sure the neonatologist was there to check out the baby once he was born. Honestly, I still pushed anyway, just not as much as I could have. At last, they told me I was able to really start pushing. Let me tell you, it felt DIVINE to push! Even with the stretching feeling, it was wonderful relief to push with the contractions. Typical in a hospital, they put me in stirrups, lying mostly on my back. I wish I could have moved around, but I was hooked up to the monitor. And I wished I could have protested the supine position and stirrups, but I was in a complete labor funk...I don’t think I could have formed the thought, let alone the complaint! So, I pushed as well as I could. And if I was vocalizing through my prior contractions, I was really making noise now! I relied on a nice, loud roars to push my kiddo out! I was starving and ice chips just wouldn’t cut it for me. I could feel my muscles exhausting, and I knew I had nothing to give them. The only thing that kept me going was the desire to have and to hold my new baby. At one point, the baby’s heartbeat dropped low, and I was threatened with an episiotomy if I couldn’t push him out faster. I can’t remember what happened, but I never got the episiotomy (thank goodness!) and I was still pushing for quite a bit longer after the threat! Things kept picking up, and after an hour of pushing (during the whole time my dear husband kept letting me know that I was "almost" there) I gave birth to our little baby at 5:23am. Once the head and shoulders were out, my husband was allowed to catch him and move him up to my chest. I could have cried right there, with that sweet baby, covered in vernix, lying on my chest. I stroked his little foot and cooed “my baby”. The cord was clamped and cut before I wanted, because they had to evaluate the baby and check out his heart. Bug had to get an EKG done to check his heart out, and they said they only picked up a couple of irregular beats, but it evened out and he is just fine. I was glad that the baby wasn’t gone long though, before he was back in my arms. I had three small tears, two of which were stitched. I pulled through all natural in the end (which qualifies me as a super hero!) It was a good birth, but not a peaceful one.
We changed his name from what we had previously picked out, which came as a shock to a lot of people! He weighed 6lbs 13oz and was 20 1/4 inches long. He is absolutely adorable, and we love him!
Monday, October 6, 2008
ACRONYM and PROPER MEANINGS:
EBF-Exclusively Breastfed/Extended BF
CLW-Child Led Weaning
SAHM-Stay At Home Mom
Monday, September 29, 2008
And, because this blog is about mothering/parenting/children, I would especially encourage you to research where each candidate stands on issues such as marriage, families and abortion. Please look at where McCain stands on abortion and marriage, etc. Conversely, also make sure you are aware of Obama's views on the topics of abortion and family.
Above all else, I stress the importance of an informed decision. Make sure you are voting for whom you believe is the right choice for you!
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
I was holding Bug on my lap while sitting at the computer, and he was bouncing up and down. Then, he leaned forward...very quickly. I wasn't able to catch him quite in time, so he whacked his little face into the edge of the desk and acquired his first black eye. It's really just below his eye, and it doesn't look TOO bad. But, way to go me, right!?! Every time I look at him now, I feel so sad because of the desk shaped imprint on him little cheek! It is pretty small, but he has a small face, too! Bug was such a trooper, though. He cried for only a minute...while I was frantically getting myself prepared to nurse him back into a happy state of bliss. After nursing, he was just fine...even with the bruise! Breast milk is magic!
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Hubby, Baby and I were all laying in bed the other night. I was laying in the middle (that's where I have to be if the boys are going to share me nicely), on my back. We were just talking and enjoying our "before bed" quality time. Bug had been so tired and hungry, but he always perks up when we get to the bed, because he knows that he will get fed and put to sleep. Well, I was kind of delaying feeding Bug, mostly because I knew I would probably fall asleep while nursing, too!
Because I was -obviously- taking too long, Bug decided to roll over onto his stomach and was holding his little head up high, looking at his mommy and daddy. He raises his eyebrows, like they will help him hold his head up higher, and stares at his parents, trying to convey the message--Time for Bed! However, because Bug wasn't fussing yet, Hubby and I kept talking and enjoying our time together.
Then I felt something bumping me. I looked over at Bug, and he was trying to latch onto my breast! He obviously didn't care that he was laying on his belly, he didn't even care that my shirt was in the way! He just wanted to nurse. So, being the kind mother that I am, I figured I would let him. I pulled my shirt out of his way and helped him just a little to latch on, and he started sucking away! It was just so hilarious that I had to laugh. When I laughed at him, Bug pulled off and looked at me with such an innocent face that I had to laugh even more. Apparently, Bug just decided that his momma is crazy and laughs all the time, because he latched on again and when right back to nursing. Of course, that made me laugh even more....I guess my laughing was quite the distraction, because Bug pull off again to see what was so funny. He was being so patient with me, and he was so hungry, I decided that I would roll over and feed my poor son in an easier position. I wonder what nursing will be like once he gets even more mobile!
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
One way I have recently found to get some fun time with my wonderful husband (whether or not Bug is around) is to play Truth or Dare. This can range from funny dares (I dared my hubby to wear our son in a baby wrap at the grocery store...even though he thinks wraps are girly) to more intimate dares (get creative...sometimes the sexy can even be hilarious!!! and that's ok)! The same goes for the Truths. Get to know him better, even if you have been married for years. Don't get offended, though. Keep this game light and fun. I had such a blast, and so did my husband. He wants to play all the time now! It was a chance for us to be goofy, and show our love. I was cracking up laughing nearly the whole time. I really felt like it was a great bonding experience with my other half! Give it a try!
Thursday, September 4, 2008
My wonderful husband, bless his ever-patient heart, bought some more diapers for our baby's busy bum. And, I blame myself completely, he bought a super cheap brand. He did this for two reasons: 1. They're cheap! AND 2. They don't support vaccines! My preferred brand of Pampers spent the month of August using money from packs of diapers bought to send vaccines to pregnant women. I know I don't agree with vaccines, but I have my reasons for wanting those wonderful diapers. The first reason is that, with the cheap diapers, I can't tell when Bug's butt is wet until my lap is also! They are so thick (which is very deceiving, because you would think that would keep them from leaking as much...I hate to break it to you though, they probably leak more than any other diaper!) But, I can handle urine leaks, especially baby ones, because baby urine isn't as bad as adult urine. And even adult urine isn't too bad, unless it's leaking when it shouldn't be, which I may or may not have had experience with in late pregnancy/early postpartum.
Anyway, the real kicker for not wanting cheap diapers comes from the other form of excrement my son so generously produces. Breastfed baby poop, as I've said before, is not 100% disgusting. I think that is a blessing from God, because He knows how often parents end up with poop on themselves. So, I had Bug in a cheap diaper, and had him sitting in his Bumbo chair while I prepared my lunch. I heard some poop noises, but thought nothing much of it. Bug has pooped while sitting in his Bumbo before, and the only problem it caused before (while he was wearing my beloved Pampers) was that the poop came up around his male parts and I had to use an extra wipe or two to get the job done. However...in the cheap diapers, I should have expected a much more disastrous result. When I pulled Bug out of his chair, there was poop ALL OVER his butt, completely covering the bottom half of the outfit I had just put him in 15 minutes earlier. Luckily, the Bumbo wipes clean fairly well, and we have a gazillion onesies for Bug to wear. Needless to say, I made a call to my hubby to pick up some non-cheap diapers on his way home from work.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Bug loves being held up in the air. It makes him smile and grunt with delight. For some reason, Bug hasn't quite mastered -squealing- with delight...or even giggling, for that matter. Although he did start yelling (at a reasonable decibel) just recently.
Anyway, one day I was laying on the floor, holding the cute, little guy up over me. After a couple of seconds up in the air, I would bring Bug back down to my chest. I would hold his arms just under his own chest to help him prop himself up, as he was still getting used to stabling his head upright on his own. This position put his cute face just inches from my own, and I would give him kisses and coos galore, before raising him back up into the air. On one particular "down time" moment, I had my mouth wide open in a smile of encouragement for my baby. Before I even knew what was really happening, I had a mouth full of spit up, warm and curdled. I shut my mouth and sat up right. Holding onto Bug still, I spit the load into my palm. My husband wasn't paying too much attention to my little play time with Bug, but he managed to laugh more than necessary when I sat up with lovely, white goo running down my chin. Luckily, lovingly, he handed me a burp rag, and I was able to clean myself up. I'm pretty sure the first thing he asked was "How does that taste?" or something to that effect. To which my reply was "Breast milk and bile." Once again, I am ever grateful that my baby is breastfed. I can't imagine what that would have been like with formula! Ugh, please excuse me while I go brush my teeth!
The topic of this post is circumcision. This subject is a very delicate one, because the choice for many is religious. I do not intend any offense to those religions that practice circumcision. However, I must say that I do not agree with it for our time.
Let me explain my own religious point of view on the matter. First off, I am a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS, aka Mormon). I am not sure of any stance the LDS church may take on circumcision, although I believe the church sees it as a personal choice to be agreed upon by the parents. I do know, that the LDS church does not require circumcision as a religious act. This is because circumcision is part of the Mosaic Law. During the time of Moses, circumcision was required to show dedication to God and an acceptance of the Abrahamic covenant. In general, Christians no longer practice the Law of Moses, which was deemed fulfilled after the sacrifice of Christ. This makes circumcision no longer necessary, as dedication is shown in other ways.
Outside of religion, circumcision is done purely for cosmetic purposes. There is disputed research done on circumcision for medical purposes, with no sound evidence. I ask that all parents research this topic and make a fully educated decision as to what is the best route for your son. Is circumcision really needed? Or should your son remain intact?
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Anyway, Bug has loved the thing since the day he was born! I would lay him down on it to give my arms a rest and he would coo away, even before he could smile! He loves it still, even though he would prefer to be in my arms! Here are some of the funny things he does, or I can help him to do with his play gym:
1. If the mirror that is attached to the gym is behind his head, he will crane his little neck back, just so he can see himself. (*Your so vain, you probably think this post is about you!*)
2. Spin in circles...clockwise. I will Bug down with his head up at one end, and just a couple minutes later, his head is where his feet were. And he always moves clockwise...maybe that means he will always be on time!?!
3. Kick a rattle that I attached, and then try to grab it between his feet. He seriously will grab the rattle between his feet, not his toes, his two little feet. It's amazing!
4. Turn on the music. He loves to stretch out and show me how tall he is getting anyway, but when he gets the music to turn on at the same time....now that is an accomplishment!
5. TRY to roll over. He hasn't quite gotten the whole rolling over thing down yet, but -MAN ALIVE!- he tries so hard! He will roll to his side, and then bury his face into the ground, trying to get his body to follow. It's dang cute, but he may just suffocate himself one of these days if he isn't careful!
6. Spit up. So, Bug was never much of a spitter (I thank my Heavenly Father for that blessing often!). However, it seems that as soon as he is on his little mat, he decides it's ok to spit up! Lovely.
7. Grab at the hanging toys, hold and shake them, then cry 'cause he can't figure out how to let go! It's really pretty cute, until he gets really mad.
8. Stand up, with a limited amount of Mommy's help, by holding onto the arches. He loves to stand, now that he knows he can, he never wants to sit (which makes it a pain to put him in the car seat, "Would you just bend your legs, PLEASE!?!?!?!"). So, I stand him up, put his hands on the arches and hold the mat on the other side to keep him from falling backwards with the mat coming down on top of him. I generally don't even have to touch him, unless he decides to let go with one hand. Then he wobbles around with one hand in the air, like he's in his own version of baby rodeo, before he falls over on himself.
Oh, how wonderful it is to have something so entertaining for the little guy. Although he is probably just as satisfied trying to show me how he can fit his whole fist into his mouth!
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
Bug has a distinct, higher-than-normal pitched cry that indicates he is tired. Tired, but totally unwilling to cave into that wonderful sleep. It is easiest for me to get him to sleep by nursing him, but sometimes he doesn't know if he really wants to nurse or not. This usually ends up with me switching back and forth from nursing to pacifier until he makes up his mind...and then he normally falls right asleep. Sadly, I trick him into sleep when he may not REALLY need it, just so I can sit and read or get some other things done (like showering). He does tend to be a restless sleeper though. He rubs his hands all over his face, and arches his back, and wiggles even though he isn't really awake. When he starts this act, I quickly try to keep him from poking his eyes out, because that tends to wake him up from his blissful, little nap!
Eventually, he does have to wake up. Usually, he chooses to do this at the most inconvenient time for me...like when I using the restroom. While he whines for attention like any newly awakened babe, I'm yelling to him, "Just a minute, Bug! Mommy's on the potty!" I always wonder how well our neighbors can hear what goes on in our apartment! Other times, when I'm not doing anything else when Bug wakes up, I love to be with him. He has that aura about him that clearly shows he has just regained consciousness. Maybe a little confused, but satisfied at the same time. He gives me big smiles, and then he usually lets off a big poop sound. No, he's not "smiling" because he's pooping...he really thinks it's funny. What can I say, he's a boy!
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
For all those mothers who breastfed for any amount of time (past meconium, that is) you know what that poop is like. Incredibly runny, yellow, and "what the heck is he eating that makes those little curds?". There once was a time when I didn't realize I should wait until I heard at least 3 poop squirts before changing Bug. This was a time when all those hormones were making me crazy. Well, I guess that is all the time, so never mind that. Bug had most likely just finished a meal, and he began to fill his diaper...as most breastfed babies like to do immediately post-meal. I smile and cheerfully place him on a changing mat (I can find no place or point for a changing table in my apartment) to fulfill my duty as mother and change my little guy's bum. I remove diaper, with one squirt size of poop in it, and I am wiping those plump little cheeks when I receive squirt number two...directly into my palm-up, wet-wipe holding hand. Surprisingly, I was able to laugh about it. I got both myself and Bug cleaned up and put a fresh diaper on the baby. Now, I can proudly say I have joined the ranks of surviving mothers who have been pooped on. It is a honor I bear with respect.
Monday, August 11, 2008
I would like to encourage ALL parents to do their research on vaccines!!! I will not fill this post with the horrifying things I have learned about the vaccine industry, but I must say that I am completely SHOCKED that parents regularly get their children vaccinated...without questioning or researching their decision at all. Please research all vaccines/meds given to children, including those that are generally given in the hospital when you are too overwhelmed to deny them (i.e., HepB, erythromycin, Vit K). Just for information, Hepatitis B is spread through drug use and sexual promiscuity. Erythromycin is an antibiotic used to treat newborn eye infections (even the nonexistant ones) given to the baby because the mother may have had an active STD during birth. And Vitamin K is given because it is generally believed that infants lack the proper amount of the vitamin, and it is needed for proper blood clotting (the baby most likely doesn't need this unless being circumcised...which will be the topic of a future "Please Research" post.)
My son is a wonderfully healthy baby and has not received any vaccines. I don't plan on him getting them any time soon, if at all.
Once again, parents, PLEASE RESEARCH!!!
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Friday, August 8, 2008
This weekend is my anniversary weekend. Yes, yes, thanks for the congrats. And, you guessed it, I need to pump. So, I get out my pump, hook it all up. I even get out an extension cord, so I can sit comfortably on the couch! That bright orange, heavy duty extension cord also helps me feel like I'm really working hard...it looks just like the cord my dad would use on site when he was building houses! Anyway, back to the couch. I have Bug there hooked on, and I quickly get the pump on the other side before I have a letdown. Success! Hurrah! Joy! I feel like a prize dairy cow issuing liquid gold! And then Bug pulls off to find out what that noise is (my pump whirring away on the next boob over)...darn curiosity of a 3 month old boy. Did I mention I JUST had a letdown. Milk is spraying all over my poor son, and I am trying to get him re-latched on. In the meantime, I have let go of the pump, the seal breaks and loses suction, and all my precious letdown milk is going to waste. Now I feel like I just got my water bill after unsuccessfully trying to fix a leaky faucet. BUT, I will prevail. I get both baby and pump back where they belong and I'm going again. Sitting comfortably on the couch is a joke. I am completely uncomfortable...although I'm still on the couch. I have baby on one arm, the other hand is holding the pump to my breast, and I'm leaning forward just enough to keep the milk from collecting in the top part of the pump. And I'm trying to keep Bug from kicking the pump out of my grip. I hold this position for half an hour. FINALLY, I have close enough to 4oz. that I'm satisfied...and a sleeping baby. That's what I call success.
Update, July 2013: I started this blog when my baby #1 was only a couple months old. I've been informed that it is time to update my introduction (5 years later, with baby #3 at a couple months old). Back then I thought I wouldn't have time to keep a proper journal (boy was I right...and now I don't even have time to keep a proper blog!), and I figured I had plenty of friends and family that would enjoy commiserating with my mom experiences (boy was I right on that, too).
The Lamentations are still my mini stories. They are my life. The good, bad, ugly...or, more than anything, the messy. Most days I still love being a mother. I love laughing with my kids, and smothering them with hugs and kisses. But the pendulum swings both ways, and some of my days are incredibly dark and lonely. That's part of life. And this blog. This is where I laugh, cry, learn, teach. This is where I have shared my most joyful and powerful life experiences, and also where I have held hands with every other mother suffering with depression.
I'd like to think that I am getting to be that seasoned mother of many that I predicted 5 years ago. My stories have definitely multiplied, along with the number of family members I have in my house. But motherhood is a lifelong thing, and I'm still at the front end of it all. This blog is where life gets real, and I hope all that read the stories here can appreciate them. I am glad to have anyone sitting here in my virtual house, sharing chocolate and complaining about being a mother and a lover.....in the most humorous way possible, of course!
(Original blog intro, 2008): Hello, and Welcome! I would like to explain one thing about this blog that is very important. I love being a mother! This blog is completely true, with the exception of my own artistic license and exaggerations. However, it is also meant to be tongue-in-cheek. Please do not misunderstand and believe that I do not enjoy being a mother!
The Lamentations are really just a collection of mini stories, things I have learned, complaints or reflections on being a parent. They are in no particular order. I just write as they come to mind, or shortly after I have experienced them...or when I have time! I will try to keep the posts organized with labels for those who are looking for empathy in a specific area.
To add to this, I am still very young, and I only have one child. Some mothers may ignore the amount of knowledge and experience that can be available from someone such as myself. Someday, I will be a seasoned mother of many. The only differences that will make is that my stories will multiply and, probably, become more humorous. I do not claim to be an expert, nor should any mother! I just enjoy my job, and I very much enjoy creative writing. And that is exactly what this blog is: a celebration of my role as a mother and a lover, manifested through my hobby of creative writing.